178 days ago…

.. was the last time I saw you, hugged you , kissed you . 178 days ago was the last day I woke up next to you and the first day of being apart for 6 Months. 178 days, Is that a lot? 178 days ago, we were carrying your luggage down stairs, into my car. You were looking around in my room making sure nothing was left behind – your last time standing in my, in our room, for a very long time. We are not sure when you will be back here when we will be together in this room again. You bid goodbye to my family, making me remember that it will be me who’s turn it is next to say goodbye to you. Trying not cry, be strong girl, you got this, were my words to myself. 178 days ago we sat in the car, left my hometown on the high way, on the way to the airport. Trying not to think what is ahead of us. Talking nonsense things to not bring up the topic of what is waiting for us. You remember you forgot your flight pillow. I feel sorry that you won’t have the comfort of your flight pillow on the flight. I am telling you to call me as soon as you reach home, and that I will be waiting for you. How ridiculous that sounds, I am gonna be waiting for you at the other end of the world to reach home. But your home should be wherever I am or my Home should be wherever you are. Keeping my mind busy with other things as long as I can, because each time I think about that you are leaving me in just a couple of minutes, it is making me cry. 178 days ago we reached the airport, parked the car – unloaded your luggage knowing you won’t come back to the car with me. Heading to baggage drop off and check in. Not wanting to leave your side. Walking around restless, trying to do other things that will not remind us of the dreading goodbye that is just a couple of seconds away. But then there it is. 178 days ago I last looked you in the eyes tried to smile, tried to be strong for you, for us. One last hug, one last kiss, one last I love you, one last call me as soon as you reach home, on last Take care. 178 days ago I bit you a see you soon. And there you went through security check. I was standing there for the longest time, until I couldn’t see you anymore. Then reality hit and tears were filling my eyes, rolling down my cheeks. I tried to not look too bad and rushed to my car. Once I sat in my car, it hit me again, that you are not here with me and you are not gonna come back soon. As I was driving home, we talked to each other on the phone. It gave us both a bit of peace while you were still in the same country, but we couldn’t be together. At the exact same time, I reached home and you boarded the plane. 178 days ago you took an airplane to leave for your Home country. .Devastated and worn out from the goodbye I fell asleep, hoping I would be waking up next to you but that will not happen for the next 184 days. 178 days ago I would have not imagined being one week away  from being reunited at Delhi Airport with you . Not long my love and the airport will be a good place for us. 7 days until I get to see you again, hug you again, look into your eyes again and wake up next to you..

See you soon.

Love,

Larissa